Xfiles: Flashback of love
by matash21
Summary: Oregon, the place where it all stated, the place where it all ends, what goes on behind the scenes that we only have to imagine about
1. The motel room

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything all rights go to CC and the x-files crew**  
**SPOILERS: Spoilers in this chapter include requiem other chapters will include millenium and all things  
Rating: k+**

He was sitting in his motel room all alone, Oregon, the place where it all started, his first case with Scully, the first time he saw her beautiful body, the time he realized there was going to be more then just friendship. He was trying to wrap his brain about the case of Billy Miles and all the other abductees'. When there was a knock at the door.

_KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK._

"Who is it?"

"It's me"

Mulder practically jumped from, the bed to the door and opened it.

"What's wrong Scully, you look sick?" Mulder said

"I don't know what's wrong" Scully replied

"Come in" Mulder said but this time ushering her in.

"I umm was starting to get ready for bed and I started to feel really dizzy, vertigo or something and then I just, just started to chills" Scully's eyes close to tears.

"Do you want me to call a doctor?" Mulder asked knowing that it was a stupid question considering Scully herself was a medical doctor.

"No… I just, just want to get warm" Scully said reluctantly getting into Mulder's bed and pulling over the covers.

Mulder's heart leapt at this action, although Scully was sick he still couldn't help but think about what happened between them a couple of months earlier. So Mulder hindered a little before spooning up behind Scully and hugging her but still feeling slightly tense about the whole situation. As he laid there he thought deeply to himself at how much Scully had lost due to him and the x-files: her sister had been murdered and she had become a test subject to the government and made baron. He couldn't lay there knowing that her life was going to tatters and it was his fault.

"Thank you" Scully replied shivering.

"It's not worth it Scully" Mulder finally articulated.

"What?" Scully asked in concern.

"I want you to go home" it hurt Mulder to say, but he knew it were true.

"Oh Mulder, I'm going to be fine" Scully replied tears growing more prominent in her eyes.

"No, no I've been thinking about it, looking at you today holding that baby, knowing everything that's been taken away from you, the chance for motherhood and your health and that baby, the things that '_we'. _You know maybe their right" Mulder pronounced a lump growing in his throat.

"Who's right?" Scully asked knowing the answer.

"The F.B.I., maybe what they say is true, that for all the wrong reasons it's the personal costs that are too high… there's so much more you need to do with your life… there's so much more than this".

Scully whom was spooned in front of him inhaled deeply letting the tears fall dominantly down her cheeks.

"There has to be an end Scully" Mulder whispered into Scully's ear placing a kiss on her cheek.

For minutes she spent crying spooned up beside Mulder, the tears dampening the linen sheet beneath her quivering body, but after an exhausting day she fell asleep, scooped up in Mulder's arms, but he himself could not sleep and thought back to quite recently… the millennium.


	2. Millenium

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANYTHING  
****spoilers: millenium partly SO ITS NOT EXACTLY HOW IT GOES ... SHOOT ME  
rating: T**

Sitting in the hospital with a wound to his shoulder Mulder was waiting to be bandaged up. Mulder remember that it was New Years Eve and as ever, he was alone. He sat back in his cubicle thinking about the only woman in the world he'd enjoy spending his new years kiss on: Scully. He wished to himself that she was there to comfort him and to hold his hand in this time of utter discomfort and mortal embarrassment. He couldn't bring himself to tell the nurses truly what happened and that he'd been attacked by the undead. The only thanks he was alive was the fact he made a protective circle around him made of salt. Luckily Scully was there to shoot the bastard or he would have been a dead man for sure. Although Scully had been in the hospital with Mulder he hadn't seen her for the past hour.

"_I wish Scully was here" _Mulder whispered to himself.

And at that the dividers opened and there stood a bewildered Scully.

"Mulder I'm going to ask you what happened" Scully stated.

"You know exactly what happened you where there!" Mulder shouted.

"I know what I saw Mulder" Scully replied.

"Then just put the scientific explanation past it and just accept the facts"

"It's not that simple Mulder, I need proof; evidence"

"Scully, you saw it with your very eyes, what more proof do you need?" Mulder was getting frustrated at this point and was suddenly alerted that he was thrusting his arms around the room, and his laceration was starting to bleed again and a state of pain his face.

"Mulder? Are you okay?" Scully asked in concern.

"No, I'm not okay, I've just got attacked by the undead and now it takes a bloody hour to wait for a nurse to bandage me up and last of all my partner wont believe me" A wall of anger hit his face.

"What did the nurse say when she was here? Do you have any _teeth _or shrapnel in it?" Scully asked deliberately avoiding the last thing Mulder had stated.

"No i don't think so, they say that its clean… still hurts though" Mulder said giving Scully his best puppy dog impression obviously wanting sympathy.

With this notion Scully placed her lips just above the wound and said

"Is that better" an awkward smile appearing on Mulder's face.

"Much, Now I come to think of it, I hurt my lips as well" Mulder announced.

"Nice try Mulder, but both you and I know that will never happen" Scully smirked but she could tell in Mulder's eyes he was disappointed.

"Well then the sooner the nurse gets here the sooner you can drop me off and spend the evening celebrating another year alone" he look at Scully with the puppy dog eyes trying to pull the guilt trick.

As he said this the nurse finally entered with the bandages.

"Are you his wife?" the nurse asked.

"No?" Scully answered dumbfounded blushing slightly.

"His sister?"

"No?" Scully was slightly confused.

"Relatives only I'm sorry" the nurse responded.

"But I'm an M.D." Scully pleaded her case.

"Then you of all people should know" at this point the nurse gave Scully the dirtiest '_get the hell out of here' _look and Scully got the hint.

"Fine, come find me when you're ready Mulder, excuse me nurse is there anywhere I can get a coffee?" Scully asked.

"In the relative room, but I'm afraid your not a relative" the nurse reminded Scully.

Scully glared at the Nurse and look at Mulder instantly telling him that she would be in the relatives room, even if she wasn't, she was dyeing for a coffee.

Although Scully knew she wasn't family, she felt like his family and sometimes more. She checked the clock as she left Mulder's cubicle thinking she had enough time to drop Mulder home, go home, take a shower followed by curling up of the couch watching time square on the box with a nice mug of hot cocoa. This was perused by a few phone calls: her mother and usually bill and Charlie swiftly trailed with Mulder drunk on the other end confessing his love for her and how he was lonely without her by his side and of coarse Scully had to ignore him and say 'Good night Mulder'. This was Scully's schedule ever since she has started on the X-files with Mulder. Scully entered the relative's room and in it stood 3 yellowing chairs, a two seater couch and a small TV. Scully peered over to the counter where there stood an accident looking electric kettle half filled with water. She raked through the cupboards trying to find a clean enough cup and some coffee… no luck. '_Oh c'mon'_ the last cupboard she looked in consisted on a bag of coffee and a tea cup. She put a heaped teaspoon of coffee into the cup and waited for what seemed like forever. Finally the boiling came to an abrupt halt and steam bellowed out of the spout. She grabbed the black coffee off the side and headed for the two seater couch and made herself at home turning on the TV. At a small box at the top of the screen it said the time, she was shocked. 11:13pm 31.12.99. Mulder had been getting bandaged up for 20 minutes. Scully knew from experience from being an M.D., that it took 10 if that, she was getting worried. She had all will to go check on what had happened, but knew she didn't want to worry over nothing, it was probably that Mulder had found a hot nurse and was chatting her up with his flirtatious chat which she was used to. So she sat and finished her coffee and switched on time square and the lead up to the countdown.

As she sat she was deep in thought. 'Now I come to think of it, I hurt my lips as well' this quotation kept bouncing around in her thoughts. How much she wished she could kiss his sweet succulent lips, wrestle with his tongue and created passionate love to him. Scully put on an act, an act which involved not showing any sign of wanting Mulder to trace his hands over her body, to never think about the times she's seen him butt naked or even trace her lips over his. She seemed to be a hard stone all the way through, but the truth was that she had a hard exterior but a sweet squishy centre. She tried so hard to build a barrier around her emotions, but when it came to Mulder the foundations came tumbling down leaving her an emotional wreck.

As Scully came stumbling back into reality she notice the time on the TV again: 11:29.

_Where the hell is Mulder?_

This time her anxiety forced her to get off her ass and check his cubicle, empty. Blood covered the bed sheets, more than when she had left him over half an hour ago.

"Excuse me?" Scully asked as she ran towards the receptionist.

"Yes m'am?"

"The man in the cubicle, where is he?" Scully pointing to Mulder's cubicle.

"I'm sorry to be the one to tell you but I'm afraid he's been rushed into theater with a suspected Pneumothorax" As she said Pneumothorax Scully heart skipped a beat and was speechless.

She walked over to the cubicle where Mulder had lain, she stopped and then sat down in the chair pulled up just beside the bed. She started blankly at the blood stains impermeated on the bed sheets, a lone tear strode down her cheek.

"I wasn't even here" she muttered.

"Here for what?" A voice asked.

"To hold his hand, to tell him I'll be here for him" She was still unaware who was standing behind her, if only she turned around to see Mulder was joking around with her.

"What happened to him?"

"He got rushed into theater with a Pneumothorax" Still not turning round.

"Who was he, what does he mean to you?" Mulder asked trying not to laugh.

"He means the world to me, god knows what I will do if anything happens to him" and with this response tears started strolling down her cheeks more frequent and fluent. This made Mulder feel guilty for playing such a cruel trick on her.

"Mr. Mulder, can you fill these in for me please" A nurse asked.

_SHIT!_

With this Scully turned around to find Mulder looking shameful avoiding eye contact with her.

"I hate you so much" Scully shouted an expression of seriousness appearing on her face as she stood up and walked away from Mulder.

"I'm sorry Scully; I just thought maybe a laugh wouldn't kill me"

"Well then you though wrong because your joke told me you were dead" tears started to protrude down her cheeks of the thought of him dead.

Mulder went into hug Scully placing his chin of her head and they molded together, at first Scully resisted but Mulder was stronger then she was and finally she relaxed and cried in his arms.

"Mulder, I don't know what I would do with myself if something ever happens to you"

Mulder grabbed Scully's chin and averted her towards his eyes, he was staring into her soul.

"Nothing is ever going to happen to me Scully" With this he kissed the top of her head.

They stood in the middle of the walkway for at least 5 minutes until Scully's eyes ran dry.

"What's the time Mulder?" Scully asked

"Umm, it's 11:45 and Scully?"

"Yes?"

"Thanks" A smile appearing on his face his eyes looking grateful

"For what?"

"Everything" with this he walked away to find the nurse with the paperwork for the insurance forms.

Scully stood confused at what just happened, she was sad and angry at Mulder but also happy that he was fine, just a stupid joke.

As the time elapsed Scully went to sit down on the chairs in the relative's room. She thought intensely to herself about Mulder and how much she wanted to kiss him when he was standing above her when she was crying into his arm, to thank him for being alright and comforting her. Sure, Mulder was a giant flirt and he was an extremely attractive man but she couldn't see herself growing old with him. His apartment was atrocious and he ate bad food.

'_I love you' stopped thinking about it Dana pull yourself together, he was doped up on morphine and didn't know what he was saying._ Her mind flashed back to about a year ago when Mulder was found floating in the sea trying to find the Queen Ann.

_Who knows? Maybe I can offer him a few drinks to get the New Year a head start, not being alone. Mulder is an even bigger flirt when he's drunk and who knows one thing may lead to another starting with the new years kiss. Hopefully us in bed together, relieve that sexual tension between us._

Scully awoke to an abrupt shake; she rubbed her eyes and looked up at Mulder who was peering over her and a smile on his face plastered from ear to ear.

"What are you smirking at?" Scully asked

"Nothing much, am I not aloud to smile?" Mulder replied

"How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough" the smile elongated.

"What's that suppose to mean" Scully inquired.

"Scully? Are you aware you sleep talk" Mulder chuckled.

_SHIT!_ "I wasn't sleep talking" Scully persisted

"So what's this I hear about drinks, Mulder, Bed?" Mulder beaming at Scully

_Umm_ "Well I was thinking we could grab a few beers and head back to mine, after a few drinks I'll drop you, Mulder, home and then I shall go back to my apartment and go to bed" Scully exclaimed trying to cover her back.

Mulder smile fell "I was hoping of something of something more erotic"

Scully totally unaware of what she was doing hit Mulder in his usual spot, it arm.

"Ow, what was that for? Didn't you notice why I'm in the hospital?" Mulder grimacing at Scully in pain.

"I'm soooo sorry Mulder, I completely forgot"

"It's okay, I'm joking with you again" The grimace turning into a smile.

"You…" Was the only thing Scully could articulate before Mulder dragged her to the small TV in the corner.

"Wowey, look at the time Scully" Mulder said pulling Scully towards the TV screen.

* * *

"Happy new year" voices echoed throughout the TV.

Fireworks exploded in the distance and the camera turned to those people having a new year's kiss. Mulder looked at Scully intently; completely unaware of Mulder starting at her due to the face she was fixated onto the TV. Until finally Scully felt a faint unease as if somebody was watching her, she turned to face Mulder to find him staring at her.

"Happy new year Scully" Mulder whispered enclosing the gap between them, before she knew what had happened his lips were leaving hers.

'_About bloody time' _Scully thought.

'_Is this just the start?' _Mulder contemplated.

As Scully pulled away an instant reflective smile formed on her face.

"Happy new year Mulder"

Mulder smile "The world didn't end"

"No it didn't" Scully replied breaking the eye contact and getting back to her life.

And a kiss that lasted only mere seconds fulfilled the satisfaction levels for both Mulder and Scully. 7 years is all it took, and for both of them, it was finally worth the wait. Next time hopefully they didn't have to wait as long.

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**Reviews are cherished greatly and i am pleased to say i am working on chapter 3 as we speak :)** ***


	3. Mulders Secret Girlfriend?

**Disclaimer: Dont own anything  
Rating: k+**

**just a short chapter to introduce the next one :- Hope you enjoy it.**

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Oregon Motel room:

It was 3 in the morning and Mulder was still awake thinking about Scully and how close they had gotten lately. 3 years ago Scully would have never dreamed of spooning up in front of Mulder radiating his heat, but now, something had changed. Mulder knew it was the years events chucked into one but Scully knew it happened when she crossed the line between friendship and lovers. Mulder loved Scully and Scully loved him, but whether Scully would accept it was the other question.

"I can hear you thinking Mulder" Scully groveled tuning round in Mulder's arms and her blissful blue eyes were staring straight into his hazed hazel ones.

"Sorry" was the only thing Mulder could convey.

"I'm warm now" Scully said indicating to Mulder and his hug.

"Sorry" Mulder repeated removing his arms but this time avoiding eye contact.

"HEY?!" Scully shouted.

"What did I do now?" He answered now slightly annoyed, still resisting eye contact. Sometimes he could never win with her, Scully knew something was up.

"Mulder look at me will you"

And at this moment Mulder looked at Scully, her baby blue eyes beamed at him. Scully could see pain in his eyes, maybe from not enough sleep or something else.

"A penny for your thoughts?" Scully asked

"It's nothing really, I'm just thinking about stuff" Mulder responded.

"Like what" Scully asked evermore curious.

"It doesn't matter anymore because everything's changed" Mulder stated.

Scully could see the disappointment buried in his eyes.

"What's changed and why doesn't it matter?" Scully requested determined for an answer.

"It's nothing Scully, just a stupid crush I though was going somewhere and turns out its nowhere"

"You've… You've got a girlfriend?" Scully couldn't believe what her ears where telling her.

"Well I thought I had something near that, yes"

"_I can't believe this, Mulder had a girlfriend and he didn't tell me, I though we were getting so close, too close for the F.B.I. rules and regulations crap, I love him so much" _Scully coincided with herself.

"_If Scully can't get the hint now she never will, c'mon man just tell het how you really feel, the worst she can do is laugh, but that's not Scully"_ Mulder pondered.

"Who is it?" Scully wondered what lady was beating her to him.

"It doesn't matter Scully"

"Don't you trust me "Scully asked knowing this could break Mulder, trust.

"Cause I do, I just don't trust myself anymore"

"What's not to trust Mulder?"

"Sorry Scully, I can't be doing this right now, I've been without sleep for 22 hours and if I don't get any sleep soon, I will end up doing something I will regret _or not_" at this Mulder turned over faced away from Scully, His heart was beating over a hundred beats per minute and a bead of sweat trickled off his forehead. He was like a teenager again, a lump formed in his throat and his palms where getting sweaty but whenever he thought of Scully laying next to him his photographic memory cursed him with a naughty picture of Scully in the shower, the lump him his pants grew with the lump in his throat.

Scully sat staring at the ceiling thoughts bouncing around her head and as she knew Mulder was falling asleep the let out a giant sigh. _Oh Mulder, if only you know how much you mean to me._

Scully sat staring at the ceiling unable to drift off to sleep, thinking about the night it finally happened, the first time the finally had sex.

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**Please review and favorite if you liked it :) Next chapter on the way shortly**


	4. Finally happening?

**Chapter 4 is fianlly here :)  
Disclaimer: i do not own anything... except the 9 series box set which i begged for :)  
Spoilers: All things  
Rating: M **

* * *

It was strange what had happened to Scully. First she met her old boyfriend and teacher, and then the same woman kept propping up. The strangest thing occurred earlier that day, Scully was in pursuit of the woman when all of a sudden the woman vanished, and it her place was Mulder. Was it a sign from god? Scully just didn't know.

"I just find it hard to believe" Mulder debated

Mulder and Scully were relaxed of Mulder's couch with their feet up on the coffee table.

"What part?" Scully asked baffled

"The part where I go away for two days and your whole life changes"

"I didn't say my whole life" Scully replied sleep suppressed in her eyes.

"You speaking to god in a Buddhist temple, god speaking back"

"I didn't say that god spoke back, I said that I had some kind of vision" Scully replied in a matter of factly tone.

"For you it's like you saying you're having David Crausby's baby"

Scully smiled at the remark of her having a baby with a Member of Parliament from England, but she wanted to tell him something, he could see it in her eyes.

"What is it" He asked.

"I once considered spending the rest of my life with this man, and what I would have missed"

"I don't think you can know, you don't know how many different lives we'd be leading if we made different choices, I mean, we don't know"

"What if there was only once choice, and all the other ones where wrong and there were signs along the way to pay attention to"

"Then all the choices would lead to this very moment, one wrong turn and we wouldn't be sitting here together, now that says a lot says a lot a lot probably more then we should be getting into at this late hour" he turned to face Scully and a smile appeared on his face when he saw her sleeping. She slept as graceful as an angel. He moved a piece of hair behind her ear and kept staring at her angelic features wishing there and then to plant one on her, but instead reached past her lustrous irresistible body and grabbed a blanket placing it onto of her. He stared at her and finally got up to make himself some tea.

* * *

At least an hour had past before Mulder felt tired, he just sat and watched Scully sleep, and he knew it was creepy, but what did she know, she was asleep. He debated to himself whether to sleep in his bed or move Scully onto his bed so he could take the couch, the final conclusion came down to him moving Scully into his bed and taking domain of the much adored couch.

_Right here it goes_

He moved Scully as if a small child taking her to bed. An arm rested behind her head and then under her bottom for support, although Mulder clearly didn't need support due to his masculine chiseled features.

_Oh shit_

Scully began to move and she woke up in his arms going towards his bed, she looked at him in a questioning tone

"Scully just stay still and relax" Mulder reassured her.

Scully did as he said and like a gentleman put her into the bed pulled the duvet over till just below the chin and kissed her on the forehead. Scully just looked at him puzzled.

"I'm going to be on the couch if you need anything" Mulder said as he switched off the light.

"Mulder wait" Scully mumbled

"What is it?"

"Can you come here a second"

Mulder switched the light on and walked over to Scully looking down at her with those deep eyes of his.

"Come down here" Scully persisted.

Mulder bent down to her level and looked at her in a baffled way. Scully leant over to him and kissed him on the cheek.

"Thank you" She whispered.

A tingle shot down his spine and an exasperated feeling felt its way into Mulder's pants. He swallowed hard.

"I can't do this any more Scully"

Mulder stared into her beautiful baby blue eyes and they glistened back. He leant in closer but not all the way, seeing if she would kiss him. He leant into 90% and all she needed to do was the 10. He sat there for what seemed like forever close to her lips until finally she broke. She kissed him so passionately he could feel the blood pumping through her lips, every second was a spark of electricity. Since New Years he had thought of nothing but that kiss they exchanged and she didn't either, its was finally happening, not just a New Years kiss but a proper full blown stimulating kiss.

"Mmm" Scully murmured.

When taking a break from there fiery kissing they leant foreheads together staring into each others heart felt eyes, smiles beaming on both there faces'. Mulder couldn't believe this was finally happening, in his apartment in his bed. They had only been kissing but it felt his soul had been opened and he was so relieved she had kissed him. When they had gotten there breath back they started again first just open mouthed kissing then he poked his tongue into her mouth so they could wrestle, it felt amazing. Mulder felt he was in a trance, his eyes never left Scully's her eyes were pull of passion.

Scully finally pulled away a smile beaming on her face.

"Let's take a break" she announced. "I'm awake now so I might as well make us some tea"

"That sounds great" Mulder smiled back at her, how could he get so lucky.

Scully stood in the kitchen waiting for the kettle to boil when Mulder came up behind her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and started kissing the crook of her neck. They stood like this for some time; Scully didn't even realize the kettle had stopped boiling. She turned to face Mulder her eyes shining up at him her pupils' mere pebbles in her eyes of Blue Ocean. He leant down and kissed her lips and she kissed back but this time she jumped on his hips and wrapped her legs around his waist. Mulder walked over laid on the couch. She moaned, the sound alone was so erotic it made Mulder tingle. Scully's legs were still around Mulder's waist and so he leant on her and kissed her lying down. He didn't want to move to fast but the growth in his trousers was beckoning him. He couldn't come to take her shirt off, he just lay there kissing her until she tugged at the bottom on his v-neck and with that he ripped it off.

"Mmm" Scully mumbled again but this time at his masculine chiseled features she always knew he had.

"I'm sorry Scully, it's been a while since the last time I got intimate with a woman" Mulder said as they took a short breather.

"Same here, it's been at least five years" Scully replied blushing slightly.

Mulder smiled at this statement, to the fact that Scully was as alien to this as he was. He kissed her so passionately his tongue leaving his mouth to ask permission into her, of coarse she accepted, why wouldn't she, she loved him and he love her.

"Scully I want to do this right, not just a one night thing and leave it as an elephant in the room like the New Years kiss" he finally got the courage to say it.

Scully smiled "I wouldn't ask for anything more from you" she pulled him down so there lips locked onto each others again.

"In that case lets move this to the bedroom" giving Scully a kinky smile.

He picked her up as carefully as he did when she was sleeping, but it was hard not to bang into walls as his face was interlocked with hers.

"Ow" he cried as he banged into the wall instead of the semi ajar door.

Scully smiled as it happened chuckling slightly to herself. He was trying to be romantic like carrying her over the threshold, but it didn't work so well.

Mulder kicked the ajar door open and he placed Scully on the bed, unbuttoning her blouse. When her blouse was undone but not completely off Mulder straddled her and started butterfly kissing the crook of her neck down her sternum to her perfectly formed breast. From her breast he moved south towards her abdomen kissing her bellybutton, Scully's stomach muscles clenching and the sound so erotic he felt the lump in his trousers grow even larger, Scully gripped Mulder's hair and started pulling at it.

"Like that do you" Mulder chortled.

He hesitated slightly before clutching the rim of her skirt and pulling it down as well as her pink laced underwear, her bra to match. Scully lay exposed on the bed and Mulder jumped off her for second to pull his trousers and pants down.

"Do you see what you do to me Scully?" Mulder pointed to his erection.

Scully smiled thinking how impressive it was.

"Do you want me to wear protection?" he asked uncertain.

"Mulder, it's not like I can get pregnant" Scully reminded him, a painful reminder to her what had happened, the abduction, the cancer and the baroness.

Mulder's smile dropped slightly, but then regained its position on his face as he realized what he was about to do.

He straddled Scully but not entering her quite yet.

"Are you ready?" He asked uncertain if this was really the right thing to do.

"7 years ready" Scully beckoned up at him.

He kissed her on the mouth and then infiltration. It felt so right for both of them to be doing it after so long of denial and avoiding, it was finally happening.

"God Scully, You're so tight"

"5years is a long time Mulder" they breathed.

At first Mulder stated slowly and friendly until it became unbearable for him. He became more rough and passionate and he cried Scully's name each time he felt he was going to climax, but he didn't and nor did she. After about 10 minutes Scully's walls started to close around Mulder and they both climaxed with each other, screaming each others name as the did so.

They lay breathless next to each other until Mulder finally spoke.

"I love you Scully" He turned to face her and kissed her on the cheek.

"I love you too Mulder" Scully smiled kissing Mulder back.

Within minutes they fell asleep in each others arms.

* * *

Scully woke up at about 4am, thinking everything was a dream what had happened she looked around to see Mulder asleep, naked._ Shit_.

She slowly got up and grabbed her clothes off the floor and headed into the bathroom. The promise he said kept filling her thoughts 'Scully I want to do this right, not just a one night thing and leave it as an elephant in the room like the New Years kiss'. Scully herself couldn't keep this promise and found it difficult to accept what had happened between them, of coarse she loved him, who couldn't he was sweet, seductive, flirtatious and he loved her, he had said so, but she couldn't deal with it. She got changed in a matter of minutes and left the bathroom. In the kitchen she found a piece of paper and a pen and scribbled onto it, leaving him a message. With that she left not looking back as she made it to the elevator and finally to her car.

Mulder awoke at around 6am; the smell of Scully still permeated the bed sheets. He placed an arm next to him expected to find Scully but she wasn't there. He looked at the floor to find none of her clothes on the floor nor wasn't any true sign that last night really happened it was all a fantasy he endured during his sleep, maybe she was still tucked up on the couch. He put his boxers on and walked out into the living room, not there. He was getting anxious that it was all just a dream and they hadn't made passionate love to each other. He walked into the kitchen and switched on the coffee maker. He turned round to find a piece of paper and written unmistakably Scully's hand writing scribble '_sorry, S'_. He convulsed slightly, it had happened, but then it hit him like a brick wall, she wasn't here, she left him after the promise he made.

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**Please review because i live for them. Chapter 5 should be up next weekend sorry for the delays but i've got exams going on (fun) lol **


	5. Love?

**Just a Short chapter trying to introduce the last chapter - I had a little more time on my hands then i realised**

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Scully was lying on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. The room was spinning due to her vertigo which stopped her from getting to sleep. Odd thoughts kept streaming in and out of her mind but one kept cropping up: Mulder. Scully tried her hardest to sleep, but it only seemed to make things worse. The last time she had felt this ill was the time she suffered from cancer, this thought got her worried.

"Mulder, Mulder wake up" Scully shook Mulder abruptly, fear engulfed her and tears started to formed.

Mulder jumped into consciousness at the sound of Scully's voice, she sounded worried, scared even. He shot bolt upright in search of the problem. He peered over to Scully her blue eyes trailed with tears.

"What is it Scully?" Mulder asked worryingly. A little less worried that Scully wasn't in any grave danger or the fact she wasn't getting abducted again. He started deeply into her eyes seeking the answer.

"I…I was thinking" Scully took a long pause, inhaled and then continued. "What, What if the cancer has come back "Tears now cascaded down her cheeks.

Mulder grasped Scully in an embracing hug, his chin resting on the crown of her head.

"Scully, the cancer hasn't come back" Mulder reassured her "You're just having one of those bad days, I think maybe when we get back to D.C you take a holiday, relax a little."

Scully relieved a giant sigh "Maybe you're right Mulder" She stuttered.

Mulder placed his lips on her forehead and inhaled deeply, the sweet aroma of her shampoo made this nostrils dance.

"It will all work out in the end, we will both find happiness, and you, one way or another will get the child you have been praying for" He said looking deeply into her glazed eyes, wiping the tears from her cheeks with his finger.

"I've already found happiness" She smiled.

"With who?" He replied a little too concerned.

Scully beamed up at him, her eyes telling the beginning of the story, the ending when she leant forward and kissed him on the lips, and her kissed back.

"You" she mumbled.

"Scully, I love you" he whispered into her ear causing the hair on the back of her neck stand on end.

"I love you too Mulder" With this deepening the kiss.

When they stopped kissing they leant foreheads together.

"I've loved you for a long time Scully, too long in fact" Mulder stated.

"I've loved you for a long time as well, longer then I can recall. I kept denying it and denying it but it kept eating away at me inside. I know I hurt you that night I left you after he had made love, the night I couldn't accept, the most magical and stimulating night of my life. It finally gnawed down into my heart for me to realize how much I need you, depend on you, and love you"

"What made you realize" was the only thing Mulder could render himself to say.

"The case involving Darrel Weaver, the case that I held your hand on your death bed, the case that you went into code blue and almost died. From when I saw the blood as you coughed to you lying in the hospital bed and insects infected your lungs I knew that I would be lost without you to guide me. You make me wonder but I still follow you and you dyeing in front of me made me realize that my life is empty without you. When you were dyeing I couldn't do anything to help you, I just sat by your bed side and held your hand" tears rolled down Scully's cheeks once more at the thought of Mulder gone.

"Scully it's not my time yet" he opened his arms for another embrace. "I'm afraid Mrs. Spooky that you're stuck with this detail until you get bored of me" Mulder laughed.

"Mulder, I could never get bored of you, every door that is closed another more exciting one opens "she smiled, accepting his offer for his embrace.

"Scully, I think its time that we slept"

Scully nodded her head and laid back down on her half of the bed, Mulder retained his earlier position of being spooned up behind and kissed her neck.

"I love you" Were the last words Scully heard before she finally fell asleep, subsided the pain of vertigo because she was numb, numb with love. Scully was in love. Not just in love. But love that couldn't be torn apart and she knew it.

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**Chapter 6 will be here soon hopefully thanks for those people who review**


	6. Is this fianally it?

**CHAPTER 6 IS FINALLY HERE! I apologies for the long update but i promise the final chapter next week or hopefully sooner.**

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She stormed out of the office and paced the corridors until Mulder came out after her.

"Mulder if any of this is true".

"If it is or if it isn't, I want you to forget about it Scully".

"Forget about it?"

"You're not going back out there, I'm not going to let you go back out there".

"What are you talking about?"

"It has to end sometime, that time is now".

"Mulder?"

"Scully, you have to understand; their taking abductees', you're an abductee, I'm not going to risk losing you"

With that Scully closed the gap between them, worry engulfed Mulders eyes thinking that she would somehow convince her to go, he stared into her eyes and the truth was skimming on the surface, she was going to listen to him. Scully embraced him with a comforting hug and whispered reassuringly into his ear.

"I won't let you go alone"

Two hours had passed and Mulder and Scully had somehow convinced Skinner into accompanying Mulder back to Oregon. Mulder and Scully stood staring at each other, not saying anything. Tears speckled Scully's cheeks as she stepped forward and gave Mulder a warm comforting hug.

"Stay safe Mulder, and don't do anything stupid, I can't lose you either". Half a smile formed on Scully's face. Losing Mulder would cause Scully's whole life to fall apart, crumble beneath her feet.

They stood entwined in a hug completely forgetting anything what was happening around them. Skinner pulled up next to them and rolled down the window.

"Are you ready Agent Mulder?"

"Yeah" Mulder went to the boot, opened it and placed his suitcase inside it.

"I'll call you if there is any news" Mulder said looking over at Scully giving her an unconvincing smile.

"Okay... Well goodbye" Scully at this point was crying harder, but she didn't even know why. She turned away towards the car park stairs and started walking.

Mulder grabbed the car door handle and opened the door reluctantly staring over at Scully and then slowly slipped into the passenger seat.

"Are you ready?" Looking at the ajar door next to Mulder

"Wait a second Skin-Man I've got to do something" he finished and jumped out of the car and bounded towards Scully whom was still slowly making her way towards the car park stairs.

"SCULLY. WAIT!" Mulder shouted.

Scully turned around, her eyes red and puffy.

"Yeah?" Hope glimpsed in her eyes.

_Just tell her how you really feel, it can't be that hard just say it, Scully I love you, C'mon man just say it, I love you, I love you, I love you._

"Can you please feed my fish?" _Dammit Mulder_.

"Yeah sure whatever Mulder" Scully replied disappointment buried in her eyes. She turned around again heading for the door and reached for the handle

"Scully?"

"_What now hover is apartment, change his bed?"_

Mulder could hear the growing anger crossed with disappointment in her eyes and stepped in front of her, his brown eyes crashing upon her blue ones, he leant forward and kissed Scully on the mouth.

"I love you" he finally said, a slight blush appearing on his cheeks due to the fact Skinner had just seen them kissing.

"I love you too" Scully confessed.

"I'm coming back, don't you worry. I promise, as soon as I get back I will make up for 7 years of unexpressed love and together we can be a family and then spend the rest of our lives together" A giant smile appearing on Mulder's face, a smile of which she hadn't been on Mulder face in a long time.

Scully's smile vanished as tears fell from her eyes as the reality fell onto her, Mulder was going to miss out on children, and it was going to be all because of her an her baroness.

"What's wrong Scully?" Mulder asked, his brown eyes trying to gain access into her blue ones.

"I can't let you give up a proper family, the wife, and the children" Scully said her eyes denying access from Mulder's and looking away from him.

Mulder grabbed her chin so that she couldn't deny his eyes stared directly into hers.

"Scully, with you there's nothing else I'd rather have in the world" sending Scully a reassuring smile, and leant in for another kiss to tell her that he meant what he said it was her and only her.

They were mid-way though kissing when a loud beep came from behind Mulder and sent him spiralling away from Scully land.

"I've got to go" Mulder reluctantly said pulling away from Scully a sorrowful look shadowing his face.

Scully was stood frozen with shock, shock of how much Mulder had opened up to her and how she knew what he had said was true, she could see it in his eyes.

He leant in for another kiss but Scully was still frozen, Mulder gave her one last look before departing for the car, Scully still stood frozen,

As Mulder got in the car Skinner looked at Mulder with a puzzled expression.

"So you and Agent Scully are dating? You know that's against the rules"

"Sir, if you don't mind me saying, how many times has me and Agent Scully broken the rules before? And how many times have we been sanctioned, And Sir?"

"Yes?"

"Do you mind if you keep this little shenanigan to yourself, were not quite ready to proclaim our love to the world yet, it took us 7 years finally to tell each other, but now were in a whole new ball game, it has to be love"

A cute yet weird smile formed on Skinners face, and Mulder knew that this meant he could trust Skinner with this little love secret, for Skinner knew what it was like to be in love due to the fact he had a wife.

"Thank you Sir" Mulder replied thankfully.

Skinner started up the engine and pulled off towards the airport so that they could catch the plane back to Oregon and hopefully find the Spacecraft they were in search of. Mulder sat in the passenger seat with a smile beaming from ear to ear, whilst back in the car park the reality finally hit Scully that she and Mulder had finally proclaimed there love for each other, it wasn't doped up on morphine or a one night stand with each other, it was 'LOVE' . Mulder peered out the window of the car recollecting the event which had not so long ago occurred

"Wow" Mulder murmured.

"Wow" Scully whispered.

Mulder and Scully thought about what had happened for so long they had been hiding there love, and now it was open on the table for the world to see, when Mulder got back from Oregon they could start their lives together, happily in love.

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**Please Review Because I Live For Them And If You Enjoyed It Please Favourite It **


	7. Gone?

**Final chapter is here  
Disclaimer: i dont own anything  
Spoilers: Reqium  
Government Patst you rock :)

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Scully stood looking over the medical records for abductees from Oregon and was shocked at what they revealed about them.

"This just cant be" A pain staking feeling entered Scully's heart and soul.

"What are you looking at?" Frohike asked wandering over and staring at Scully, alarm bells began to siren as he saw the distress in Scully's eyes.

Scully took a deep breath. "Medical records, Billy Miles and other known abductees from Bellefleur, Oregon. They all experienced anomalous brain activity".

"Electrosuferlitic trauma"

Scully's heart began to pound at the thought. "Which is exactly what Mulder experienced earlier this year.

"I don't understand" Frohike added.

"There was something out there in that field; it knocked me back, because it didn't want me. Mulder thinks it's me that is in danger of being taken"

"When its Mulder who's in danger"

_Mulder, you cant go, you can't leave me alone. These past few weeks have been spectacular, without you there is nothing to live for, you make my life complete. Mulder if anything happens to you, I will never forgive myself for letting you got to Oregon without me._ Scully's brain was working into overload, the last thing she saw was Frohike, Byers and Langley gathered over her and the she blacked out.

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"I think she's waking up, call the nurse" Frohike was leaning over the bed looking down at Scully; he looked at Langley when he spoke who in turn looked at Byers who left the room to retrieve the nurse.

"Scully it's Okay, you turned faint on us and blacked out, you've been out cold for fours hours now" Byers interrupted.

Scully was about to respond when young looking nurse entered, must have just come out of school.

"Ms Scully I'm glad to see you're awake, but gentleman you will need to leave Ms Scully alone for a while to get some rest" the nurse was sweet and tended to Scully by pouring her some water.

Langley, Byers and Frohike looked at the nurse and then looked at Scully, he eyes where full of concern and worry. Scully gave them a nod to say she's going to be fine on her own and they left.

"What happened?" Scully asked the nurse, more worry drowned her eyes.

"You fainted Ms Scully, a little over four hours ago" the nurse said. "Your Doctor will be here shortly to tell you everything you want to know"

Scully sat in silence, thoughts roamed her mind. _"What if I was right, what if the cancer has come back"_

She felt like she sat there forever, thinking nothing but the illness which had exhumed her body over two years ago. A lone tear sought its way down the side of Scully's face and as it did the door opened and a middle age male was standing in the doorway. She knew he must have been the doctor because he was wearing scrubs, but they were different to the nurses.

"Ms Scully, glad to see you're finally awake" he said with a smile.

"I'm Dr. Evans and I've been treating you today"

Scully gave him a half smile, worry still lingered in her eyes. "Do you know why it happened?"

"For some reason your body went into shock, sometimes our bodies do this when we get put under to much stress. Have you been feeling ill lately, maybe lightheaded or dizziness?"

"Actually, a couple of days ago I got chills, and then it felt like I had vertigo, the room was spinning, do you think it's my cancer?" Scully's voice turned hoarse at cancer.

"I was actually thinking more along the lines of pregnancy, I've seen many cases like this, you've been putting yourself under too much stress, perhaps skipping a meal hear or there. This is telling you that the baby is being affected when your body gets put under too much stress" Doctor Evans stated.

"Pregnancy, it can't be, there has to be some kind of mistake, I can't have children"

"Well under my presumptions I ran a few tests when you were out, you can look at your notes but they will only tell you what I've just said, you're pregnant"

Tears started spilling out of Scully's eyes as she read her own notes, it confirmed the doctor's suspicions, Scully was pregnant. The doctor looked at Scully with understanding eyes.

"But, how I mean, I was told I couldn't have children by one of the top doctors in D.C"

"Have you have unprotected sex with a man?"

"No… wait yes_Mulder_" Scully inhaled deeply.

"Then it seems that you have been given a miracle" Dr Evans said smiling at Scully.

More tears fell as she thanked God under her breath; she had been given a miracle with the man she loved, she was carrying Mulder child, she placed a hand on her abdomen and smiled.

"How long do I have to stay here?" Scully looked up from her abdomen towards the doctor.

"Well we still have to run more test on you to see if there is anything else wrong but other then that a couple of day after some monitoring". The doctor smiled at Scully and left the room, Scully sat alone feeling cold and felt like she was missing something.

Scully sat thanking God about the miracle she had been given, her hands were on her stomach and tears fell out of her eyes like a waterfall, and she sat like that until there was a knock on the door.

"Come in" Scully shouted, removing her hands from her abdomen and placing them next to her on the bed and wiped her eyes.

From the doorway Maggie Scully emerged, she stood staring at her daughter, who in return was staring back at her with her pebble blue eye.

Maggie's thoughts were the same as Scully's before she had heard, that the cancer had returned and that she would lose her only daughter from the terminal illness. After the death of her husband and the death of Missy, Maggie couldn't face any more grief.

Scully drew half a smile "Hi Mom"

"Dana? What's wrong, it's not the cancer is it; it can't be back, can it? Maggie's voice became raspy as she couldn't imagine another death.

"No Mom" Scully reassured her Mother.

"Then why are you in the hospital and why are you crying?" Maggie's eyebrows dropped at the sight of her daughter crying in a hospital bed.

"Mom, the doctors have given me news which will changed everything in my life, it has also changed my views on God" an illusive smile appearing on her face.

"Yes?"

"Mom… I'm pregnant" A smile formed on Scully's face but the waterworks restarted.

Maggie walked over to her daughter's bed and sat next to her. Scully sat up and hugged her mother like she had when she was in the hospital with cancer, the difference was Scully was fine and carrying a miracle child.

"That's great news Dana" Maggie said rubbing the small of Scully's back trying to ease her tears.

"I know, after so long of being told I can't conceive and even artificial insemination, I finally began to accept the fact I couldn't have children, and then I fall pregnant after one time" the tears subsided and a smile beamed through as Scully began to recall how it had happened, the night that brought her and Mulder to a point they had never reached before, confessed love.

"Who's the father?" Maggie asked.

At this question Scully let go of her mother and looked straight into her eyes, revealing the truth once and for all.

"Fox?" Maggie asked in a calm tone unsure of her daughter's reaction.

Scully hung her head in shame; she was punishing herself for not being a strict Christian. Bill had married Tara before they had children, Scully on the other hand slept with Mulder once on a whim and now she was pregnant with no sure promises ahead.

Maggie pulled Scully's chin up so that she was looking into her eyes. "I wouldn't have chosen anyone else to be the father of my grandchild, you love him don't you?" Maggie asked her, knowing the answer already.

"Yes I love him; I love him more than any man. He's protective and handsome; he makes me smile when I think about him and his eyes make me melt like butter." Scully said a smile plastered on her face, but then the smile vanished when she finally knew what was missing, Mulder.

"Where is Mulder, I'm sure if he knew you were in the hospital he'd be by your side, holding your hand"

"He's in Oregon on a case, an x-file" Scully added.

Maggie looked confused, had her daughter been taken off the x-files after all this time.

"Mulder said I should stay back in D.C because the case involved abductees being taken, but this time not being returned." Scully stopped took a deep breath. "He didn't want to risk losing me again so he took A.D Skinner to Oregon to pursuit the case." Tears restarted as Scully knew why she had blocked out Mulder, the pain of it hitting her.

"Then what's wrong?" Maggie asked.

"Every known abductee' had been previously put in the hospital with anomalous brain activity. Mulder had exactly the same thing happen to him earlier this year, it wasn't me who was at risk, it's… its Mulder" Scully cried to hard that she knew it was the newly developed hormones as well as her own fear of losing Mulder.

"Come on now Dana, Fox will be fine, he's strong and determined and if I know him he's on his way here now to see you" Maggie always seem to put bad things into a good light.

"I suppose you're right Mom, thanks" Scully hugged her Mom and then Maggie left her daughter to get some rest, the thought kept haunting Scully, she just lay in the hospital bed staring up at the ceiling waiting for Mulder.

Hours past and she was hoping to see Mulder walk through the door, but he didn't. An hour after Maggie left Scully alone she entered again, tears speckled, Maggie's cheeks.

"Mom, what's wrong?"

"I'm so sorry Scully" Maggie went and sat down at the end of the bed.

Tears trickled down Scully's cheeks; she already knew what her Mom was going to say.

"A.D Skinner phoned the hospital and said he needed to talk to you, I insisted that he told me and that it would be better that I told you." Maggie took her daughters hand and took in a deep breath.

"It's Fox, he's gone" Maggie felt the hand under hers move.

This time no tears fell,Scully was in denial. She was unsure if she was ever going to see her lover, the father of her child and best friend again. Scully sat for hours staring at the blank hospital wall. Refusing to eat or drink, Maggie was getting really concerned, and so she walked in to Scully's room with a plate of food and left it on the table next to the bed.

"Dana you have to eat".

"I'm not hungry" Scully protested.

"Think about the baby Danes" her Mom offered her the plate of food, and Scully reluctantly gave into her Mom, her baby was the most important thing in her life now, and without Mulder it was going to be tough.

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Scully sat in the room alone; she had not yet shed tears since she told her mother about the pregnancy, she couldn't accept it. She saw him standing at the door but decided to turn away from him and then he entered. It was A.D Skinner

"Agent Scully"

"Hi "Scully said

"Hi" Skinner responded

He closed the door behind him and headed over to Scully's bedside.

"How are you feeling?" He asked, the truth seeking its way out.

"I'm feeling fine, there just running some tests on me".

Skinners mouth moved, but no words came out, Scully knew what this meant, Mulder was nowhere to be seen.

"Umm" Skinner finally uttered.

Unable to look skinner in the eyes she looked down and bit her lip

"I already heard" Scully said, the tears finally fell.

"I lost him; I don't know what else I can say. I lost him." Skinner tried to hold back the tears; he thought it was his fault Mulder had vanished. "I'll be asked what I saw, and what I saw I can't deny, I won't"

An awkward silence filled the room both Skinner and Scully were crying. Scully's blue eyes sought comfort in his soft brown ones.

"We will find him, I have to". Scully said determinedly

Skinner was just about to walk away when Scully spoke.

"Sir… there's something else I need to tell you, something for you to keep to yourself, I'm having a hard time explaining it, or believing it. But…" A massive smile appeared on her face. "I'm pregnant".

Skinner looked at Scully with disbelief, Scully was crying and exasperated, she was alone with a child, a love child. It was going to be hard for Scully to look after her child alone, let alone never seeing Mulder again.

Skinner walked out of the room and left Scully to her thoughts.

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She got out of bed and strolled over to the window and looked out. A starry night sky welcomed her as she placed a hand on her abdomen and then a hand on the window. "Mulder, this is our little miracle" She whispered. "I will find you, and we can be together forever" A lone tear fell down Scully's cheek. "I love you".

_FINIS

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**Please review my final chapter. All Matash21 fans don't fear because a new story will soon be here. I enjoyed writing this story, although its not my favourite i liked know that you guys read it.**


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